Love, Happiness and Togetherness – The Attainable Goals
This post, is a follow up to “5 Secrets of Happy Couples” (read here), published on earlier, sharing more tips and insights on what really makes for a happy couple. Couples that are happy together may not have any big secrets to their success, but they do have important habits and practices that ensure a lasting and happy relationship. Here are 5 more of those habits and practices, that really contribute to a happy relationship:
- Common Interests. It’s okay to have your own things that you like to do, but having common interests will guarantee that you spend time together and ensures that you always have something to share and look forward to. Find a hobby, (i.e. gym, tennis, painting) that you can both enjoy together. Then, make it a habit to do those activities together on a regular basis (once a week).
Whether having common interests was the thing that brought you two together in the first place or not, you can also develop new interests together over time as well. Most happy couples have like minds, like hobbies or both.
- Be Sympathetic. Even happy couples can occasionally disagree. It’s important to sympathize with your partner’s point of view in addition to having your own opinion. Try to see both sides. More importantly don’t make an argument into a contest that you have to “win.” Instead you should strive to come to some mutually-agreeable solution.
Fighting can often become a contest between couples – one habit of happy couples is having the ability to see the other’s point of view and having the willingness to compromise.
- Forgiveness. This can be closely related being sympathetic to your partner’s point of view as well as having good communication skills. Once you forgive someone of doing something, it’s no longer fair game to bring up at a future date. Don’t keep opening up old wounds or you will scar your relationship. Leave past actions in the past.
- Rituals. This can be anything from taking a nightly walk in the park to making your romantic partner breakfast in bed on Sundays. Having some small ritual that only the two of you share can be comforting, reassuring and it will certainly reinforce the bond between you. This ties in closely with developing common interest, and actually doing them together. Spending time with your partner is important to keep your bond strong.
- Spontaneity. Being spontaneous is the icing on the cake. Leave a love note in their briefcase, take a detour from the “usual” and shake things up a bit. Spending date night doing something different than just dinner, can even shake things up. Go to the skating ring, watch a play, or play miniature gold. Be spontaneous and a little silly. This breeds excitement and wonder and it also tells your partner that you took the time to do something that you knew would make them smile.
There are tons things that can be classified as habits of happy couples. The overall message is to be mindful of your relationship and to not take it for granted. Like a beautiful garden that comes back each year, a relationship needs to be cultivated and cared for.
Are you communicating like a happy couple? If you think you and your partner could benefit from couples therapy, contact my Los Angeles Couples Therapy office to arrange for an appointment. It’s never too late for love.